Wait! Its not what you think. I’m not giving up on my life but I am giving up a lot of other things.
I am giving up on drugs and alcohol. I am also giving up all the crap that came with it. I am giving up being broke all the time. I’m giving up on the paranoia while on drugs. I’m giving up on the hiding. I’m giving up on the hangovers. I’m giving up on using friends. I am giving up to a higher power in my life that is going to help me in my recovery.
I am now clean and sober for sixteen days and this is just the beginning of a new life that I plan on having. I want to be a much better person who can actually make changes in other peoples lives. I actually have a great desire to actually start helping in the homeless industry in any way that I can. If anything I would like to be able to work in a kitchen at one of the shelters here in this city.
Right now I am actually getting a chance to volunteer my services in the Alpha House kitchen and I feel quite comfortable helping out. I really appreciate the kitchen staff that make such wonderful and nutritious meals for the clients of the detox program. I have had the opportunity to help Peter and Avril out and it makes me feel like a different person. I feel so alive when I can give back to the place that is helping me in my recovery. Avril and Peter are very kind and compassionate with all the clients and I cant say enough about how wonderful they really are.
I am still at Alpha House and probably will be until near the end of March at which time I hope to get into the Salvation Army’s addiction program on the fifth floor. As a condition to me staying for such a longer period of time while I await treatment I will be attending the day program at AADAC which is now known as Calgary Health Services. I start the assessment awareness program on Monday which is from 9-11 until Friday and then on the 7th I go for two weeks from 9-4. I actually am looking forward to this program to regain some of the tools that I need to be using in order to maintain a drug and alcohol free life.
I can’t say enough good things about Alpha House, except to say they have become a powerful support in my life and I hope that I will be able to give back some of my time to them in the future after my release date. The release date is still yet to be set but as I said, it should be around the end of March.
I want to thank all those that have left comments supporting me in my recovery. I want to thank Kim in particular because she has also been a very supportive person in my life and I just love her so very much. By the way, I love my new nickname, timbits. Lets just hope Timmy’s let me keep it lol.
You, my reader , are becoming a big support in my life and I hope that I can make you proud. Wait, let me rephrase that. I will make you proud!
In closing, I am getting closer and closer to being able to see my children and I will continue to update you on my life. I promise to continue blogging and I just ask that before you go to bed tonight, say a little prayer for me and to other addicts that may be struggling with their addiction. I love you all for your support. I am clean today and plan on being clean tomorrow too!
Delighted with the new me
Thank You Thank You Thank You
16 Days and still counting!!!!!
Tim Barber
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
What's Happening Now?
I wanted to talk a little more about Alpha House and what my plans are for my future.
First of all, I would like to take back a comment that I made about Alpha House in my earlier blog. I understand a lot more about what it is like to be a staff member working at Alpha House and they actually have a lot more patience with their clients then I gave them credit for. For this, I am truly sorry. I don’t think that I personally could handle some of the crap that they have to deal with day in and day out. The staffs actually do a wonderful job dealing with the clients that come into the shelter part of their system which I call intox. I will be talking about the Detox program shortly and about how wonderful the staff is there as well.
I would like to point out that I had said that the intox makes the DI look good and I was so wrong to say that. They are actually a lot better then the DI’s so called harm reduction program which is also for those drinking or using. For one thing, at least at Alpha House you have a mat to sleep on at any time you come into the shelter, where as during the day at the DI’s intox during the day you are only able to sleep on the floor without a mat. For this I am so grateful for the Alpha House for providing a mat so you don’t end up with the chill of a hard concrete floor. I think maybe the DI should at least consider making a change in that policy. I am sure they could get volunteers to clean mats. Considering that the DI has a lot more guest clients then Alpha House.
I would like to tell you that after I put the last blog on, I got into the Detox program the very next day and I can’t say enough good things about the wonderful staff that has helped me to start thinking about my life in a new way.
First I was asked to do an initial intake with one of the Detox staff by the name of Mark. He was actually quite pleasant and told me right off the bat that I would be able to relax a couple of days before having to take part in some of the programs and meetings that take place while in Detox. I will discuss these shortly. Mark actually took me for a walk around the unit which by the way is above the intox part of the shelter. He pointed out where the different resources were made available and basically made me feel very comfortable. I was also assigned to what I call a Resource Advisor whose responsibility was to monitor my progress while I was in Detox. The lovely people I was introduced to were Gwen and Alana. Both these ladies have been very professional in their job and have helped with my future plans for my life. These two ladies were the main people I have been dealing with while I stay here at Alpha House. I have also dealt with other casual workers as well as other full time staff that have been very kind in their approach to people such as myself that deal with addictions. All the staff including the staff from intox deserve a big pat on the back for there professionalism with people with addictions and I would recommend Alpha House as the place for any one that wants to deal with addiction issues. So, if you are a parent, a brother, a sister, a friend or an acquaintance of someone dear to you that are dealing with addictions, I would recommend you talking to an Alpha House staff member on how they can help.
The Detox has meetings held here as well as other various programs that clients in Detox are required to attend after there initial two days of rest. Not only that, clients are also to take part in daily chores. One of these chores is washing down and sterilizing mats in intox program every morning around nine thirty-ten o’clock. I realize that some of the clients don’t like to take part in this and they do whine about it but they really shouldn’t. It is a way of giving back to Alpha House for all the hard work that they do. Alpha House feeds the Detox clients very well and even provide snacks twice daily at three and nine PM. The food here is very nutritional and very good, I could never complain.
In closing I would like to make a couple of suggestions for Alpha House. Remember that I always like to be a critique and it is just my opinion. I feel that Alpha House Detox should actually have more addiction related type of meetings to make addicts understand more of what it is they are dealing with. They do have some of these in place as of present but I would recommend even more.
Please Alpha House, keep up with the wonderful job that you are doing for the homeless and addicted three hundred and sixty five days a year. You really are making a difference in a person’s life. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Now for a little bit about what is happening in my life. I am number one on the waiting list to get back into the Canter of Hope Salvation Army addiction program and I hope to be in by the end of February. It will be an opportunity once again to get my life turned around and thanks to Alpha House they are making this possible.
In closing, my lawyer has now got the OK to serve the Red Deer school board to get the address of my Children’s mother and hopefully within the near future I will actually have the reality of seeing my children once again. YOOHOO!!!
Got to go now, thank you all for your wonderful support and I look forward to posting another blog soon with more progress.
Thanks for caring Calgary
Never Alone
Going to Meetings
Tim Barber
PS-Quick Saying for fellow addicts
7 Days without a meeting makes 1 weak!
First of all, I would like to take back a comment that I made about Alpha House in my earlier blog. I understand a lot more about what it is like to be a staff member working at Alpha House and they actually have a lot more patience with their clients then I gave them credit for. For this, I am truly sorry. I don’t think that I personally could handle some of the crap that they have to deal with day in and day out. The staffs actually do a wonderful job dealing with the clients that come into the shelter part of their system which I call intox. I will be talking about the Detox program shortly and about how wonderful the staff is there as well.
I would like to point out that I had said that the intox makes the DI look good and I was so wrong to say that. They are actually a lot better then the DI’s so called harm reduction program which is also for those drinking or using. For one thing, at least at Alpha House you have a mat to sleep on at any time you come into the shelter, where as during the day at the DI’s intox during the day you are only able to sleep on the floor without a mat. For this I am so grateful for the Alpha House for providing a mat so you don’t end up with the chill of a hard concrete floor. I think maybe the DI should at least consider making a change in that policy. I am sure they could get volunteers to clean mats. Considering that the DI has a lot more guest clients then Alpha House.
I would like to tell you that after I put the last blog on, I got into the Detox program the very next day and I can’t say enough good things about the wonderful staff that has helped me to start thinking about my life in a new way.
First I was asked to do an initial intake with one of the Detox staff by the name of Mark. He was actually quite pleasant and told me right off the bat that I would be able to relax a couple of days before having to take part in some of the programs and meetings that take place while in Detox. I will discuss these shortly. Mark actually took me for a walk around the unit which by the way is above the intox part of the shelter. He pointed out where the different resources were made available and basically made me feel very comfortable. I was also assigned to what I call a Resource Advisor whose responsibility was to monitor my progress while I was in Detox. The lovely people I was introduced to were Gwen and Alana. Both these ladies have been very professional in their job and have helped with my future plans for my life. These two ladies were the main people I have been dealing with while I stay here at Alpha House. I have also dealt with other casual workers as well as other full time staff that have been very kind in their approach to people such as myself that deal with addictions. All the staff including the staff from intox deserve a big pat on the back for there professionalism with people with addictions and I would recommend Alpha House as the place for any one that wants to deal with addiction issues. So, if you are a parent, a brother, a sister, a friend or an acquaintance of someone dear to you that are dealing with addictions, I would recommend you talking to an Alpha House staff member on how they can help.
The Detox has meetings held here as well as other various programs that clients in Detox are required to attend after there initial two days of rest. Not only that, clients are also to take part in daily chores. One of these chores is washing down and sterilizing mats in intox program every morning around nine thirty-ten o’clock. I realize that some of the clients don’t like to take part in this and they do whine about it but they really shouldn’t. It is a way of giving back to Alpha House for all the hard work that they do. Alpha House feeds the Detox clients very well and even provide snacks twice daily at three and nine PM. The food here is very nutritional and very good, I could never complain.
In closing I would like to make a couple of suggestions for Alpha House. Remember that I always like to be a critique and it is just my opinion. I feel that Alpha House Detox should actually have more addiction related type of meetings to make addicts understand more of what it is they are dealing with. They do have some of these in place as of present but I would recommend even more.
Please Alpha House, keep up with the wonderful job that you are doing for the homeless and addicted three hundred and sixty five days a year. You really are making a difference in a person’s life. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Now for a little bit about what is happening in my life. I am number one on the waiting list to get back into the Canter of Hope Salvation Army addiction program and I hope to be in by the end of February. It will be an opportunity once again to get my life turned around and thanks to Alpha House they are making this possible.
In closing, my lawyer has now got the OK to serve the Red Deer school board to get the address of my Children’s mother and hopefully within the near future I will actually have the reality of seeing my children once again. YOOHOO!!!
Got to go now, thank you all for your wonderful support and I look forward to posting another blog soon with more progress.
Thanks for caring Calgary
Never Alone
Going to Meetings
Tim Barber
PS-Quick Saying for fellow addicts
7 Days without a meeting makes 1 weak!
Friday, February 11, 2011
This Will Blow Your Mind
Interesting, however! I have no fucking idea of what’s so interesting. I need help!
I am sorry, but not really, my life is really fucked right at this very moment!
Here I am sitting at the front door of Emmanuel Church, at the bus stop and I don’t know what to do next. I look around , traffic is flowing quite nicely, there’s not a lot of people walking around, it could be exactly what I needed. We’ll see!
You no what, I think I’ll go for a walk.
I went for a walk and bought a cup of coffee. Actually I found a Starbucks Card with $5.75 US , so this is actually the second cup of coffee off of the card, Lucky Me! lol Not Funny!
Time for the interesting part. I told you I would blow your mind so I will give you the quick version , then we will get into the events which happened.
Received $1104 dollars on Tuesday morning, it is now Wednesday Afternoon. You see where I’m going with this. Hold on, your in for a Hell of a ride.
I take another walk, this time I find a half joint of marijuana so I went to go sit under the bridge. The location does not matter. I used the crack pipe I had to smoke the joint. What a rush! So here I am several hours later,
By the way , I am at Alpha House. I’m not amused.
I don’t exactly hate myself but I feel pretty shitty.
I have heard it said that you learn from a relapse. How many times do I have to learn before I graduate. What I’m trying to say is, your always learning something or other in life. However , I’m still learning.
Alpha House is just one example of learning. Problem is, I must have forgot, or just played stupid.
Alpha House:
1 A lot of drunks.
2 Crabby staff-not all ( sorry, but you should record your day and watch it later and you would understand what I say.)
3 Very hard to get food.
4 They actually make the D.I. look good (I cant stand the D.I.)
Anyway, here I am again, At this moment I am waiting for them to put out some snacks. I haven’t eaten since Tuesday morning when I had a bowl of Rice Krispies. Its now 4 PM, I need something in my belly. I also haven’t slept since then either. I end up getting a bite to eat and passed out.
So I will now try to fill you in on the rest of the details. It all started when I received my T4 from Coremark. I decided to take it in to HR block, figuring to get back maybe $300. As I have already pointed out, I got back $1104 dollars. I can say quite truthfully that my thoughts were not on using when I went there but by the time I left, I couldn’t get the thought out of my head.
The first thing I did when I received my cash card was head straight across the road for a beer. After finishing my beer, I took the bus to the Casino where I took out the 1100 dollars. I never did play any of the slots. I actually proceeded to call a dealer and away I was in a cab. 15 minutes later I arrive and buy my first big chunk of crack. This cost me 240 dollars but would last me the next couple of hours. I went to the living room, and preceded to do my first hoot in about a couple of months.
That first hoot does its trick but I don’t stop at just one. NO! As soon as I finish that hoot I decide to send one of the houseguests to buy me a 15 pack of beer and 2 packs of smokes. By the time they get back with the beer I have already had a few more hoots. I only end up having 3 beer out of that first case and of course even more hoots. The only thing the hoots were doing by this point was making me more paranoid and very sketchy. I actually even asked the guy living at the place I was at if he knew a woman I could get together with, which he did. She showed up about a couple hours later. However, the only thing we wound up doing was getting more stoned and drinking a few more beer. not much beer though and absolutely no sex. By 10 AM the next morning I was broke except for 8 dollars in change which I would spend fairly quickly.
So I leave, all fucked up and still somewhat paranoid. Which actually brings me back to the beginning of this story.
It is now my second night at Alpha House. I actually went out for a few hours to get some cigarette butts and some fresh air. It seems weird putting that in one sentence, but that’s what I did.
I have not taken my meds in 3 days and I am starting to get a little shaky and grumpy, and I have very little energy. I hope to take my meds soon as I am still waiting for them to be dropped off.
The staff here seem a little less crabbier then from the day before. I also have my name on the detox list for the second day in a row. I am hoping that I can get in, as I said, I need help.
I should quickly mention that there was an article in the Sun on Thursday talking about crack and crime. The article stated that 8 or 9 out of 10 crack heads will resort to crime to fuel their addiction. I can tell you that I am not one of those people. Even though I agree with what was said in the article , I don’t want people to think that I fit in the category of those 8 or 9 people. Just because I use crack, don’t think for a second that I use crime to fuel my shitty addiction. I do not and will not ever steal to get drugs and if I ever do, please just shoot me!
I don’t know exactly what’s going to happen over the next few days but I do hope that I can find the help I so desperately need . I really don’t know what else to say now except to say that I am still learning and a lot further away from graduating.
In closing, I would like to thank the Alpha House staff for all of their help. I’m starting to understand what they go through on a daily basis. I don’t think it is so wise to work a 12 hour shift when your dealing with drunks and druggies. It seems to me that when you are getting closer to the end of your shifts, you tend to lose patience with your clients more frequently, not all staff. I would recommend shorter shifts. This is just my opinion. I will say this, keep up the good work. At least you have been patient with me.
This brings me to Friday morning and I have finally taken my medication and I feel somewhat better. I did not get into detox again today but I do have my name on the list again to try Saturday morning.
In closing, I ask that you, my reader, to please be patient with me while I try to figure things out in my life. Please keep me in your thoughts and in your prayers. I need your support more then ever and I hope that you will still provide that.
Still Living Homeless
Your Writer,
Tim Barber
P.S The only good thing about hitting rock bottom is that there’s no place to go but up.
I am sorry, but not really, my life is really fucked right at this very moment!
Here I am sitting at the front door of Emmanuel Church, at the bus stop and I don’t know what to do next. I look around , traffic is flowing quite nicely, there’s not a lot of people walking around, it could be exactly what I needed. We’ll see!
You no what, I think I’ll go for a walk.
I went for a walk and bought a cup of coffee. Actually I found a Starbucks Card with $5.75 US , so this is actually the second cup of coffee off of the card, Lucky Me! lol Not Funny!
Time for the interesting part. I told you I would blow your mind so I will give you the quick version , then we will get into the events which happened.
Received $1104 dollars on Tuesday morning, it is now Wednesday Afternoon. You see where I’m going with this. Hold on, your in for a Hell of a ride.
I take another walk, this time I find a half joint of marijuana so I went to go sit under the bridge. The location does not matter. I used the crack pipe I had to smoke the joint. What a rush! So here I am several hours later,
By the way , I am at Alpha House. I’m not amused.
I don’t exactly hate myself but I feel pretty shitty.
I have heard it said that you learn from a relapse. How many times do I have to learn before I graduate. What I’m trying to say is, your always learning something or other in life. However , I’m still learning.
Alpha House is just one example of learning. Problem is, I must have forgot, or just played stupid.
Alpha House:
1 A lot of drunks.
2 Crabby staff-not all ( sorry, but you should record your day and watch it later and you would understand what I say.)
3 Very hard to get food.
4 They actually make the D.I. look good (I cant stand the D.I.)
Anyway, here I am again, At this moment I am waiting for them to put out some snacks. I haven’t eaten since Tuesday morning when I had a bowl of Rice Krispies. Its now 4 PM, I need something in my belly. I also haven’t slept since then either. I end up getting a bite to eat and passed out.
So I will now try to fill you in on the rest of the details. It all started when I received my T4 from Coremark. I decided to take it in to HR block, figuring to get back maybe $300. As I have already pointed out, I got back $1104 dollars. I can say quite truthfully that my thoughts were not on using when I went there but by the time I left, I couldn’t get the thought out of my head.
The first thing I did when I received my cash card was head straight across the road for a beer. After finishing my beer, I took the bus to the Casino where I took out the 1100 dollars. I never did play any of the slots. I actually proceeded to call a dealer and away I was in a cab. 15 minutes later I arrive and buy my first big chunk of crack. This cost me 240 dollars but would last me the next couple of hours. I went to the living room, and preceded to do my first hoot in about a couple of months.
That first hoot does its trick but I don’t stop at just one. NO! As soon as I finish that hoot I decide to send one of the houseguests to buy me a 15 pack of beer and 2 packs of smokes. By the time they get back with the beer I have already had a few more hoots. I only end up having 3 beer out of that first case and of course even more hoots. The only thing the hoots were doing by this point was making me more paranoid and very sketchy. I actually even asked the guy living at the place I was at if he knew a woman I could get together with, which he did. She showed up about a couple hours later. However, the only thing we wound up doing was getting more stoned and drinking a few more beer. not much beer though and absolutely no sex. By 10 AM the next morning I was broke except for 8 dollars in change which I would spend fairly quickly.
So I leave, all fucked up and still somewhat paranoid. Which actually brings me back to the beginning of this story.
It is now my second night at Alpha House. I actually went out for a few hours to get some cigarette butts and some fresh air. It seems weird putting that in one sentence, but that’s what I did.
I have not taken my meds in 3 days and I am starting to get a little shaky and grumpy, and I have very little energy. I hope to take my meds soon as I am still waiting for them to be dropped off.
The staff here seem a little less crabbier then from the day before. I also have my name on the detox list for the second day in a row. I am hoping that I can get in, as I said, I need help.
I should quickly mention that there was an article in the Sun on Thursday talking about crack and crime. The article stated that 8 or 9 out of 10 crack heads will resort to crime to fuel their addiction. I can tell you that I am not one of those people. Even though I agree with what was said in the article , I don’t want people to think that I fit in the category of those 8 or 9 people. Just because I use crack, don’t think for a second that I use crime to fuel my shitty addiction. I do not and will not ever steal to get drugs and if I ever do, please just shoot me!
I don’t know exactly what’s going to happen over the next few days but I do hope that I can find the help I so desperately need . I really don’t know what else to say now except to say that I am still learning and a lot further away from graduating.
In closing, I would like to thank the Alpha House staff for all of their help. I’m starting to understand what they go through on a daily basis. I don’t think it is so wise to work a 12 hour shift when your dealing with drunks and druggies. It seems to me that when you are getting closer to the end of your shifts, you tend to lose patience with your clients more frequently, not all staff. I would recommend shorter shifts. This is just my opinion. I will say this, keep up the good work. At least you have been patient with me.
This brings me to Friday morning and I have finally taken my medication and I feel somewhat better. I did not get into detox again today but I do have my name on the list again to try Saturday morning.
In closing, I ask that you, my reader, to please be patient with me while I try to figure things out in my life. Please keep me in your thoughts and in your prayers. I need your support more then ever and I hope that you will still provide that.
Still Living Homeless
Your Writer,
Tim Barber
P.S The only good thing about hitting rock bottom is that there’s no place to go but up.
Monday, February 7, 2011
I Really Need A Laptop
Hello all, if by chance you have an old laptop kicking around your home, I sure could use it. I do not care if it is beat up and old, or even if it is internet worthy, so long as it has a USB port and i can put my memory stick in it, it will work for me to continue with my book. I actually have some more stuff on paper that I have been writing for the last couple of months and would really like to get it on memory stick. I would surely appreciate this, if you have one to donate to me. In return I would be happy to do some general labor work at your home or business.
I am doing very well and I want to continue to do well and this would help a great deal. A special thanks go's out to all that support me in my journey. Hopefully I will have my own place by the end of this month , a place I can call home. Please continue to keep me in your thoughts and in your prayers. All the best to all, and to all a very pleasant weekend.
I am doing very well and I want to continue to do well and this would help a great deal. A special thanks go's out to all that support me in my journey. Hopefully I will have my own place by the end of this month , a place I can call home. Please continue to keep me in your thoughts and in your prayers. All the best to all, and to all a very pleasant weekend.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Just Babbling
Its always been a plan of mine to try and get back in touch with my children, and It seems as though it is taking forever. It is absolutely frustrating not knowing what is going on in their life. I really want to be able to share some of their childhood with them, I want to be their when they have their first crushes, be there for a birthday a Christmas, be there for whatever they would need a dad to be there for.
Its been 5 years and yet i feel like i have lost the only thing in life that means anything to me. Actually i have lost the 2 things in life that i want back so badly that i hurt each and every day.
I remember when i was younger, i made myself some promises that i thought that i would always stick to. One of these promises was to always stay with my children should i ever become a dad. The reason i made this promise to myself was because i never had a father while growing up and even to this day i wonder what my father was like. Was he a lost soul like me?
Even though i try to stay positive, it seems to get harder and harder every day that passes me by without Tyler and Destiny. My son Tyler will be turning 9 in May and my daughter Destiny will turn 10 in June.
On to other things, i am now staying at the Mustard Seed Foothills shelter and trying to figure out where my life is going from here. I am actually looking for housing in a room of any sort, so long as it is a safe place where people don't use drugs and alcohol. I actually have to go talk to someone today in regards to a place.
I hope that in the months upcoming i will be able to find some peace in my life. It is an awful lonely feeling being homeless and i really want to change these circumstances so that i can lead a more rewarding life. I even have a hard time continuing my book because when your in a shelter there is always people around and i am not into people looking at what i am writing. Its my own damn business and i want it to stay that way until i am ready to release it to all to read.
I want to quickly thank all those who continue to read my blogs and encourage you to continue to read them as i will be putting more on in the near future. By the way, i am still continuing to struggle with my addiction but i am doing a lot better then i have and i am finding the support that is helping me cope with my urges. i am also trying to get a new network of friends who do not drink or use drugs, this is actually a very hard challenge.
I don't want to bore you all any longer then i have to, but i do hope you will leave words of encouragement as i can tell you that it really helps me tremendously. Thanks again for all your support and enjoy your day.
Tim Barber
Not Alone
Its been 5 years and yet i feel like i have lost the only thing in life that means anything to me. Actually i have lost the 2 things in life that i want back so badly that i hurt each and every day.
I remember when i was younger, i made myself some promises that i thought that i would always stick to. One of these promises was to always stay with my children should i ever become a dad. The reason i made this promise to myself was because i never had a father while growing up and even to this day i wonder what my father was like. Was he a lost soul like me?
Even though i try to stay positive, it seems to get harder and harder every day that passes me by without Tyler and Destiny. My son Tyler will be turning 9 in May and my daughter Destiny will turn 10 in June.
On to other things, i am now staying at the Mustard Seed Foothills shelter and trying to figure out where my life is going from here. I am actually looking for housing in a room of any sort, so long as it is a safe place where people don't use drugs and alcohol. I actually have to go talk to someone today in regards to a place.
I hope that in the months upcoming i will be able to find some peace in my life. It is an awful lonely feeling being homeless and i really want to change these circumstances so that i can lead a more rewarding life. I even have a hard time continuing my book because when your in a shelter there is always people around and i am not into people looking at what i am writing. Its my own damn business and i want it to stay that way until i am ready to release it to all to read.
I want to quickly thank all those who continue to read my blogs and encourage you to continue to read them as i will be putting more on in the near future. By the way, i am still continuing to struggle with my addiction but i am doing a lot better then i have and i am finding the support that is helping me cope with my urges. i am also trying to get a new network of friends who do not drink or use drugs, this is actually a very hard challenge.
I don't want to bore you all any longer then i have to, but i do hope you will leave words of encouragement as i can tell you that it really helps me tremendously. Thanks again for all your support and enjoy your day.
Tim Barber
Not Alone
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