Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Another one

Its been some time since I actually have written a post on this blog and figured it was time to update all my readers on the past year and a bit. I am presently having a great meal as I write this blog. I am having ham and roast potatoes with broccoli. It is really good. Back when I last posted, I was running a new business I created called Timmys Only. I am currently not doing this but should be again by mid to end of July. I actually had myself a big slip and started using crack for the umpteenth time. I can tell you that I have currently been clean from crack since Christmas past. I am actually doing very well and I even got back into an addiction program about 2 months ago, and things are going very well for me. I am now again currently considered homeless once again, even though I do reside in a room that is paid for by the government. However, I feel very good about the way my life is progressing and I am with a woman I knew from about 17 years ago. Her name is Leesa and we get along very well.Oh by the way, we may actually have a child together and he is now 15 years old and we are looking into getting a paternity test done just to see if he is my boy or not. I truly believe that God has given me a second chance in life at being a father. Its not to say that I have forgotten about my 2 other children Hell, no! I actually think about them more then ever now that my life is turning around. Its just that I still have many hurdles to overcome in my life. A life that will involve being with Leesa and my possible son. I will not share his name at this time as I have not asked for his consent and I think it best to wait until after I actually know the truth of the matter. I can tell you that I plan on doing things a lot different this time around. For starts, I now think a lot about my day that lies ahead and whenever I am bothered by an event of that day, I deal with it in a safe and comfortable manner. Does this make sense to you? I would love to tell you how me and Leesa found each other but I am going to leave that for another blog. Oh, I do plan on writing much more about my life in the coming months and do hope you continue to follow. For those of you that are reading this on facebook, I invite you to read other blogs I have written and see for yourself the life I live. I am Tim Barber and I hope to entice you all with a piece of my life. I will actually be posting more about the book I am writing on my life, so please feel free to go to my blo now www.livinghomelessourwritetospeak.blogspot.com Until next time, Thanks for reading and have a great summer, Your writer Tim Barber AKA- Timbits

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Still Happy!

Wow! I am in an incredibly great mood as I write what may be one of my finer blogs. Not to sound cheeky, as one of admirers would call me. I am but an ordinary person….Yeah right!!!! I’m sorry, but I do like to think that everything I do is but yet a dream. I however, am not dreaming. No, I am totally aware of everything going on around me. The music, me dancing, me thinking, and of course, Me Being Positive. Baby, I’m in a damn good mood, OH! Did I say that already!!! Duh! For some reason or other, life has been somewhat over-whelming to me lately. Its not that I don’t think that I deserve it but I am in total Awe! Of all this. To explain All this, its simple, Media! Ever since I started my business, and for those of you that don’t know, it’s called Timmy’s Only. What a great idea I came up with and am now trying to grow with all I have in me. I have been bombarded with media people that want to get my story. All I want to do now is continue to wake up with my positive attitude, as I have for the past six or seven months. I think that I have changed for the better and I want to continue to be that better person that I always want to be. Its not that I stopped being a better person. I just sometimes ventured off the path…For that matter…I stumbled on a damn nasty path at points in my life. I am not however going to dwell on my past. I have been a person who has not only become positive but I am now very determined to get access to my children….I am going to accomplish this very soon. As a matter a fact, I would not doubt that by the time Calgary has its big Stampede Parade…I will have actually have seen my kids at least once…Mark my words people…Timbits is back and he aint gonna let anything get in his way… Besides…It would be incredibly hard to stop this dancing fool…I sit here before you, my audience …Doing a little jiggy…Wow!! I am in such awe of myself that I feel as though I need a bigger challenge..Ok, getting a little carried away but Man, am I ever feeling good…NO! I am not drunk nor high people…Just damn Happy!!! I just want to end by saying one thing….THANK YOU! Your Writer..Timbits

Sunday, February 12, 2012

No Negitivity Please!

Oh my goodness, did you see me on the front page of the Calgary Herald? On Thursday January 26/2012 I was in the paper. The most important thing about it was the fact that it was a good news story. Really, I didn't do any thing bad! lol

I did get into my place up in Coventry in North Calgary. However, I came home one night and found my landlord using a needle. Right at that time I decided that I needed to get out of that situation as quickly as possible. I decided that I would leave a month notice so I could get back my $100 deposit. Well I can tell you that I am no longer at that place but don't worry, I am still being housed and I will get to that very shortly.

What happened was actually a blessing in disguise. I ended up turning a negative into a positive. About three days after I seen my landlord using the needle, he had misplaced a bottle of Tylenol 4 and blamed both me and the other roommate of taking it. A couple of days went by and we thought that it was over but boy were we wrong. I came home last Thursday after helping Kim with Walking with the Homeless and this asshole landlord started flipping out again over his missing pills. It ended up that he wanted both of us dwellers out because he thought we went in his room and stole his pills. I simply tried to tell him that I would gladly leave at the end of the month so long as I got my deposit back. Well this just seemed to piss him off and threatened to beat the crap out of me. I ended up calling a friend who picked me up and what happened next was definitely by the grace of God.

This wonderful woman put me up in a place till the end of this month and is also going to help me with a damage deposit to get into somewhere different at the end of the month. I can not tell you how much I love this woman for what she has done for me.

I feel so incredibly strong theses days and my life just keeps getting better and better every single day.

I would also like to add that I now sit in my place all alone and I just realized how strong of a person I really have become. I have to tell you that I am so frigging proud of myself for everything that I am starting to accomplish and I am going to accomplish so much more.

Also want to point out that I did my road test yesterday and now have my drivers license again and can start working on getting a vehicle. I am so siked because I am so close now to my goal of getting access to my children once again.

Tyler and Destiny....Daddy's going to see you soon!

On a final note, things are picking up with the business and it is looking better and better every single day. I am gaining clients on a daily basis and it looks like word of mouth about my business is spreading. I also have some great ideas that I am working on and I do plan on sharing them with you in the near future.

For now that's all I have. Thank you all for your tremendous support, and remember that I always encourage you to write comments.

For those of you who commented on my last blog, thank you for your comments and please remember to tell your friends about my blog.

Side note: Have started working on my book again.

Your writer,
Tim Barber
Some know me as Timbits!

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Life is Beautiful

I just want to let all of my followers know that I am so friggin happy at this point in my life and things are moving in a forward direction. I have started a new business by the name of Timmy’s Only Delivery and it has really improved my self esteem.
I am somewhat confused how I personally can see and feel the difference.
I don’t really know exactly how to explain it but I will try.

As some of my followers are aware, I was housed up until a few months ago. Since my becoming homeless once again, I have become a lot less stressed and plenty of time to think about my situation.

Sometimes being homeless can be easy; however, saying this, I must say that it also isn’t a walk in the park .I think sometimes that it can be too easy to become caught up in the system. I say this because I have been caught in this homeless trap on more then one occasion and have actually learned from my past mistakes.

As of Thursday night I will into housing of my own once again and I must tell you, I feel very proud of myself for getting a place in such a relatively short period of time. I will be living up north near Country Hills Blvd.

About a month ago I met a new friend by the name of Chris..He is a great person and he has also helped me with some creative ideas of his own for this business. Chris is also getting into housing as of tomorrow. He has actually found a different place. A month ago when we first met…Oh before I forget, we have met previously through the Salvation Army but had never really struck up a conversation… back to what I was saying..A month ago neither one of us really thought we would be housed at the end of January. Yet, here we are both getting into a place and is due in great part to our staying away from the Drop In Center during the day and both of us have been very happy and upbeat about life during the past month. We are probably currently the happiest homeless people in all of Calgary, one day away from being housed…oh what a joyous feeling….we are both proud man…One other thing me and Chris have in common is..We will never forget where we came from and hope to help other homeless in the near future and I know we will…I promise…

I would like to add to this blog a quick note that I am a very determined father trying to get access to my children and I believe with all my heart that this is a great opportunity to show exactly what Tim Barber is all about. Destiny and Tyler…Watch out..Daddy’s coming…I love you and I miss you and I will hold you and hug you very soon…

Before I go on any further, I would like to let you all know that I am no longer afraid of what the next minute, hour or day will bring…I don’t think in the past and am moving forward in my future…Thursday morning there should be a story about my business in the Calgary Herald and I am sure I am going to be very busy…I invite you to buy a copy of the paper tomorrow and you can tell all your friends that you are a follower of this person…Or whatever..Anyway..Thank You all for your kindness and overwhelming support…Please comment on this blog and remember those who are still struggling to find their way..I know I still try to do the best I can to encourage others in any situation…and I most definitely always provide a friendly smile…You would be amazed what a smile can do for others..not just the homeless but anybody..Even you…

I am sending my happiness your way and I do hope it puts a smile on your face..now go and pay that smile forward…Thanks again for the most wonderful support a man could ever have…

One last thing before I go…Kim Porter Gagnon…You are and always will be my Hero..I love you…always…

Almost there
Tim Barber

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Happy Tim!

I am starting to become happy and I'm not scared any more. I am actually starting to think a lot differently about life these days. I would say that this is a very good sign that things are getting better in my life.... I, Tim Barber am starting to understand a little more about the meaning of life. ...

OK.. Have I confused anybody yet? I have had my good days and my bad days... Everyone gets them. I think! Lately things have been going... How do i put this... I've been much happier when i wake up in the morning lately...No dirty thoughts please...

The fact of the matter is.. I have learned to adapt to a homeless life! I, however am not going to let this easy way of life drag me further to my knees. Yes, i said it.. I think it is to easy to live homeless here in the City of Calgary. It is a topic that would take up to much of this particular blog.. so lets move on...

I am very proud of myself... I have now officially(business license) and all become a homeless entrepreneur. My new business is called Timmy's Only...
Can you believe it.. I have a small business... I know.. I'm still in shock too!
It is a delivery service for Downtown Calgary..Mostly coffee and donuts but I plan on delivering whatever my customer wants(McDonald's,subway,Timmy's,etc..)

I am currently residing at what they call the warehouse...,It is a part of the Drop Inn Centre...It is actually a safer place to be , then the actual Drop In...Compared to the Drop In, the warehouse is ten times better,...

I really don't know what else there is that I would like to share with you at this point but I needed to write about my happiness...I will tell you this though... I will be posting more frequently.. I look forward to comments.

Tim Barber

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Christmas Blues Once Again

Really , i don't know where to start. I sit here at a table at the Drop Inn center looking at about 150 or so others that are I presume homeless, just like me.

Here, as I sit, I wonder what ails each and every one of them. For me, there no question. My children!

Yes, I miss my children and it feels sometimes like I will never see them ever again.

When early December arrives, I tend to get very depressed and I cant seem to focus on anything in my life. Today is no different.

Of course, being homeless doesn't help my situation much at all.

October 23rd I became homeless once again and part of me is actually OK with this. What I mean to say is. Nobody controls me anymore. When I was in the Keys To Recovery Program, it seemed like i was being controlled. I was actually always thinking about my childhood, when the Government had full control over my life. I never liked it then and I surer the hell don't like it as an adult. I don't like being told what I can and cant do in my life. My life is my life!

Being homeless I actually control what will happen next in my life. It is actually a lot less stressful. At least less stressful then having to answer to the Keys program.

I have not lost complete hope, i will see my children again in the near future and I am presently working on a solution to my dilemma.

A few days have gone by...Now I am on a mat at the Mustard Seed Foothills Shelter. It actually blows me away to see so many familiar faces that were here last time I stayed here. I wonder why it is, why oh why are they still here?

However, I need to stop wondering about others and start working on straightening my own life out.

As I said earlier, this is a very tough time of year for me and it seems to get harder every year that goes by, especially not seeing my children in so very long. Some time I actually wonder if the world would be a whole lot better without me. Then I think about all the good I think I could do, if only i would get my life in order. There really is no easy solution. If there was, I would have already tried.

The biggest change in my life is coming up. I actually have a really great business idea in mind and want to start it first thing in the new year. January 2nd to be precise. If all goes well, I will not only be able to get a place of my own but a vehicle as well within a couple of months.

You see, on August 29th, my family lawyer informed me that the judge wants me to re-apply for access to my children in six months. At that time I must have a place, a job and a vehicle in which to travel back and forth to Red Deer with. Red Deer is where my children live. If you don't know already, their names are Destiny and Tyler.. I actually understand that the judge just wants to make sure that I can make it from Calgary to red Deer in order to have visits and I'm OK with that.

It will be very difficult to accomplish this in the next few months but dammit, I am determined. I want to see my children. I have plenty of motivation and I know I am capable.

I really don't know what else to share at this time. I will tell you all that I am not using and I am focusing on trying to get things together for my business idea. I would love to tell you more but I will save that for another blog.

I would like to wish you all a happy holiday and a great New Year. Please keep me in your prayers. If anything i would want for Christmas it would be the support that I have so often got from you, my reader. Please continue to be that support, because it really does help. Remember that comments are always encouraged and I look forward to more from this blog.

Thanks for letting me share!
Will post again soon.
Your writer,
Tim Barber

Thursday, October 13, 2011


So here I go again...

What I mean to say is...As of October 23rd I will be homeless once again, but I will get into that very soon. First I should let you all know what happened with the court date that was just over a month ago.

The bottom line is.. I must wait another fucking six months before I can attempt once again to try and get in contact with my children... NO! I'm not pissed about this...I am very angry... I am now supposed to make sure that I am working full time, I must have a place and I must have a vehicle in which to drive back and forth to Red Deer in.

The fact is, I feel like I can no longer deal with this fight and I am very close to giving up entirely. However, I beleive I still have some fight left in me. Lets get back to this in a moment, shall we.

As I said earlier, I am about to become homeless again and I really am not to concerned about this for some reason. I actually feel it will releive some of the stress that I am under right now. The thing is, I have been in this program called Keys To Recovery since the beginning of April and everything was going fine until one day this organization decided to walk in my apartment without proper notice while I was sleeping. This is against the law.Plain and simple. They had no right. Ever since, I have felt very uncomfortable and always wondering if they would ever do it again, I dont know. That is besides the point. There are other things that I did not agree with that has now put me in my position but I beleive they were looking for any excuse to get rid of me and it came in the form of me being 76$ behindin rent and they left me a notice of eviction. I do not really want to get into detail about this but will tell you that I plan on leaving peacefully and I am taking this to a lawyer because they ARE ALSO ACCUSING ME OF PERFORMING ILLEGAL ACTIVITIES IN MY APARTMENT WHICH IS A BUNCH OF CRAP. i WILL ADMIT THAT THEY DID A DRUG TEST AND FOUND POT IN MY SYSTEM, BUT IT WAS A JOINT THAT i SMOKED DOWNTOWN AND NOT IN MY APARTMENT. aNYWAY, i AM GETTING REAALY UPSET WRITING ABOUT THIS AND WOULD RATHER TALK OF OTHER THINGS.

Obviosly i was getting mad because everything became big letters and I really dont want to go back and re type everything.. Sort of funny..To me anyway...lol...

To get back to my children. I do love and miss them very much and I hope that I will find some way of overcoming some of my fears and doubts and just get ready to fight this. I truly believe that it is a fight that will be worth it in the end.

I dont have a lot else to say... I will say this...Thanks to those with such encouraging words.. You all know who you are and it is because of you that I will continue to fight.

Almost Homeless Again
Your Writer
Tim Barber